Undeclared: Spidey vs. Spidey

Sadly, these days’ movie goers are more interested in rebooting movie franchises than going to see anything different. While I’m not completely against reboots or remakes per say, I feel that they should be warranted for more than milking the cash cow dry. Although saying that I must recognize that while unneeded, some reboots have surprisingly improved on the original. That is why for round number two of Undeclared I am pitting two friendly neighborhood Spider-men against each other for true super hero superiority. Both of these character and franchises have done great jobs at representing the source material in their own specific ways.

So, now it is up to you my loyal readers to duke it out and tell me which Spider-man reign supreme. Without out further adieu I give you our two symbolically eight-legged gladiators. To my left, weighing in at an impressive 162 pounds, I have the sultan of insults, the spinner of webs, Mr. does whatever a spider can…The Amazing Spider-man! And to the corner to my right, I have the sultan of…okay, I think you can see where I’m going with this one. Tell me which wall-crawler reigns supreme in your heart and why? Both incarnations have positives about them while both have glaring problems. Remember to cast your vote below and comment with your reasoning. Make your nerd commander proud and let the eternal debate begin!

Spidey  (Andrew Garfield)

Pros: 

  • More resemblance to original character
  • Hotter girlfriend
  • One more arm than his adversary
  • Larger ingenuity to create own web shooters
  • Has a darker/edgier appearance
  • Martin Sheen is his uncle (in the movie)

Cons:

  • Sally Field is his aunt (in the movie)
  • Whinier
  • Lacks organic web shooters
  • Lacks ability to talk to girls
  • Gives up identity to just about everyone
  • Has no rich best friend
  • Main villain is a Goomba reject

Spidey  (Tobey Maguire)

Pros:

  • Has a rich best friend
  • A more hulking Spider-man
  • Girl friend/ love interest doesn’t wear bra while walking in the rain
  • Enhanced powers from an alien symbiote
  • Low gas mileage on his scooter

Cons:

  • His rich best friend isn’t too bright and the worst villain ever
  • Annoying girlfriend who couldn’t find her way out of a paper sack
  • Most adversary villain looks like a Power Ranger reject
  • Can’t make it to class on time
  • Worst pizza delivery guy
  • Has random impotency of the web shooters
  • Dance skills that would make John Travolta spin in his grave if he were dead

- Joe D.

About these ads

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s